Feb 28 2008
PSP Review: Patapon (2008)
I really tried hard to like Patapon but ultimately the constant grinding previously seen only in hardcore MMORPGs has proven to be a complete waste of my time. In Patapon, you are a deity in control of the cute eye-ball like people, and you control them using the drums. With your drums mapped to the face buttons, you can tell them to attack, defend, move and perform miracles by pressing the buttons in time with the beat. This music component is interesting, but unlike other rhythm games where difficulty extends over time, Patapon doesn’t. You will be pressing the same combination of buttons thousands of times by the end of the game. How many times can you press triangle, triangle, square, circle before you get tired of it? This game will make you find the answer. At some point, you’ll be wondering why you can’t just direct those damn-adorable creatures to where you want them to go in a point-and-click affair.
And those adorable eye-ball like creatures need weapons and armors as they face against Zigatons and bosses through their journey to find their lost land called “Earthend”. There is a minor tactical element involved in how you configure your army: some missions are great for melee-attack Tatepons, Yaripons use spears, and Yumipons are your archers staying at the back of the army for better vantage. Eventually you gain access Kibapon, Dekapon and Megapon which offer more powerful units for your army. It is up to you to equip them with powerful weapons to counteract ever-increasing enemy difficulty.
Equipment is where the game grinds down to a halt. You see, there is no way to purchase powerful weapons as they are only dropped during regular stages, and boss battles. In boss battles, you must defeat a big creature such as a dragon in order to get these equipments… but this requires you having to defeat the same boss multiple times. Even worse, each time you defeat a boss, the difficulty goes up.
To synthesize your army, you need the game’s currency which is called “ka-ching”, and the best way to do it is to hunt for animals. It is a very simple stage as there are no enemies, just animals grazing on the field. You must kill them to earn “ka-ching”. Needless to say, you must do this many many times too. It is unfortunate that the charm is utterly destroyed by monotonous gameplay and grinding for money and equipment.
Rating: 40%
